Hold On To Your Sanity, It’s the Happy Science Platform

Here’s the sequel to my original post about the Happiness Realization Party, in which I discuss their amazing party platform. This article has zero relevance to anime, but after the original story was posted to MetaFilter I feel like this blog is the best place to put it. I’ll make it up to regular readers next month with a post about The Laws of Eternity.

HRP News

According to the Japan Times, the party leader position in the HRP has been passed from Ryuuhou Ookawa’s wife to the Buddha Lord himself.

I’d also like to note something that is easy to deduce about Ookawa’s leadership plan. Since few to none of the HRP ticket candidates have any political experience, and all of them believe Ookawa is God, they will likely do little legislative work of their own and simply allow him to manage them as a block. This means that even if it gains a small minority of Diet seats the HRP could have considerable influence, as a quick glance at the past few years will show that the major Japanese political parties are rent with intraparty factionalism.

It’s entirely possible that HRP will claim less than three seats and be completely irrelevant, in which case you should read on for amusement’s sake only. But consider this: DPJ, the expected winner of the general election, will need to form a coalition government. However, the party is wanting for allies. The LDP is their rival party and has an enormous power structure, so combining the two for a coalition would be hell on earth and lead to failure. New Komeito supports the LDP. That leaves the Communist party– a fun group to ally with– the single-person non-parties, and HRP.

HRP Advertising

In Japan, political parties advertise with posters. Lots and lots of posters. New Komeito sends all Soka Gakkai members posters to hang on their front doors, which leads to a fun game where you point out which houses on the street are Soka Gakkai. How does Happy Science do it? Well, let’s see.

courtesy 2ch news flash vip blog

Translation: “If you want to be poor, vote LDP. If you want to die in a nuclear blast, vote DPJ. [in yellow:] If you want to be rich and safe, vote HRP.”

This poster is remarkable in its brazen name-calling. It’s probably the most blatant and proud statement of objective superiority of any democratic election in the 21st century. This is of course derived directly from Happy Science’s fervent belief in the divine correctness of their leader’s political views.

The linked blog includes two reader reactions, which are respectively amusing and telling:

“I honestly don’t know what the fuck.”
“You know, if you remove the words in yellow it’s pretty accurate.”

Here’s how the HRP approaches candidate advertising:

If nothing else, they cannot be faulted for lack of zeal.

It is also reported by my readers that the HRP has taken up the common Japanese campaign technique of driving around the streets with megaphones, except these megaphones are several times louder than your average politician’s and interrupt people’s dinners and work. One wonders if the Tokyo Police bureaucracy is attempting to figure out at this very moment how many decibels are acceptable for megaphone campaigning.

The HRP Platform

The HRP has a platform consisting of three simple points, conveniently ordered on a spectrum from irresponsibly ultra-right to surrealist batshit looney. This guarantees that no matter what they are put in charge of in a hypothetical DPJ-HRP coalition government, they will bungle it terribly. In this article I will discuss each of the sections of the platform in detail:

1. We will foster a spending boom by completely abolishing the consumption tax, the inheritance tax and the gift tax.
2. We will protect the people of Japan from North Korean missiles.
3. We will create a 300 million-person nation by the year 2030, and will make Japan’s GDP number one in the world.

This platform is elaborated in a sixteen-page Manifesto which has helpfully been translated into English by the party itself. The manifesto begins as follows: “If God or Buddha were watching over Japanese politics as it stands today, He could not simply stand idly by.” How thankful we should be that God/Buddha is literally here in the form of Ookawa. In case you’re doubting the sincerity of Ookawa’s belief, let me paraphrase from a speech he gave in California: Ookawa stated that Jesus cried out to him on the cross back in 33 AD. In this speech Ookawa also talked about the dangers of nuclear proliferation– an interesting subject considering what is to come.

1. The Economic Plan

Ookawa’s devotion to regressive economics must be seen to be believed. Here’s a little taste of the Japanese equivalent of the Ron Paul R3volution: “We will promote a fundamental reassessment of the central bank system and the currency system, such as by allowing banks to issue their own banknotes.” Sounds great! Oh wait, the U.S. had that system in the 19th century, and it was pure chaos.

We will… realize a Nikkei stock index of above 20,000 yen.

The plan to reach this weighty goal is to eliminate most taxes entirely. But wait, you say! Without taxes, how will you pay for the necessary functions of government? Don’t worry, Ookawa has that figured out. The economy will rise so quickly that the tax cuts will pay for themselves! Ookawa seems to be involuntarily channeling the recently departed spirit of Milton Friedman.

A few taxes are singled out for very special badmouthing in the HRP Manifesto. The gift tax “discourages consumption among the wealthy classes”, and the inheritance tax (a progressive tax which rightist groups in the U.S. dubbed the “death tax”) “smacks of communism”. By abolishing the securities tax (which applies only to stocks and bonds–an extremely progressive tax!) Tokyo can become “the financial center of the world”. No doubt this ultra-rich free-for-all will cause some sort of economic havoc. Japan could be the next Dubai! Whether this would be good for the country in the long run is another question entirely.

Finally, there are some captivating words from Ookawa on the future of technology. The HRP will “nurture robotic industries” to secure Japan’s economic future. Hmm… could this have something to do with his prediction that in the 23rd century robots will be doing all our work for us?

2. The Population Growth Plan

At the same time, we will take policies to increase Japan’s population, and will aim to make the GDP of Japan the highest in the world by 2030 when we hope the population will reach 300 million people. We will offer support such that each household will be able to have an average of three children, which will increase the population to 200 million.

You thought the last part was insane? We’re just getting started, guys. In this section Ookawa proclaims that Japan’s population will hit 300 million by 2030. Japan’s current population is 120 million– and shrinking rapidly. Studies have shown that governments cannot cause birthrates to turn around. Birthrate is determined almost entirely by social pressures. Now, I guess if the entire country were converted to Happy Science, Ookawa could exert his charismatic influence to make everyone have ten children. But in a country where having a wife is outlandish and a child a minor miracle, promising to double the population is roughly equivalent to promising to bring us unicorns from the moon.

Not to mention the population goal is ludicrous for a country the size of Japan. It seems apparent that this plan assumes everyone will live in cities. Where will the food come from? Agricultural subsidies are discussed, but nobody wants to farm in modern Japanese society. Also, they’re dropping rice tariffs so the existing farms will evidently just go bankrupt. I guess by the time we start worrying about importing billions of pounds of rice from Communist China, robots will somehow appear to make food universally accessible: “hydroponic plant factories” are mentioned at the end of the document.

3. The Immigration Plan

The remaining 100 million people will be immigrants welcomed to Japan from overseas

Here’s the other half of that 300 million promise. The immigration policy is possibly the only forward thinking part of this entire document, and it’s interesting that no other Japanese party has been bold enough to say anything like the following:

• We will institute Japanese language lessons at nights and on weekends at public elementary, middle and high schools, thereby increasing opportunities for foreigners in Japan to learn Japanese.
• We will strive to have large cities with populations of one million or more people create communities amenable to residency for foreigners, and will work to make English a semi-official language.
• We will actively promote the naturalization of foreigners. In principle, we will confer citizenship upon all foreigners who work in Japan for approximately five years, commit no crimes while they are here, attain a certain level of proficiency in the Japanese language, and sign a pledge to fight for the defense of Japan in times of need. (In certain cases, we will also add the condition of one year of service in the Self-Defense Forces. We will also strengthen the legal system to prevent spying.)

They also promise to provide affordable housing and alleviate the naturalization bottlenecks facing Filipino babysitters and nursing home workers. But the next bullet point reminds you that these plans have nothing to do with recognition of Japan’s cultural, social, or spiritual strengths that attract millions of tourists every year, but are merely a bizarre byproduct of Ookawa’s plans for an ultra-rich libertopia:

• We will abolish the inheritance tax, which will attract the wealthy strata of people to move to Japan and will promote their taking up permanent residence here.

4. The Education Plan and Happy Science Government Takeover

Ookawa is going to ban cram schools and privatize public universities. He will teach all Japanese students economics and business. (Doesn’t the global depression make this national get-rich-quick scheme seem somewhat dated?) He will also enact Bullying Prevention Statues, which I imagine are something akin to Britain’s utterly horrible ASBO system. I will leave the feasibility of these projects as a test to the reader. Oh, and by the way, he will delete the part of the Japanese constitution that prevents the establishment of a state religion. This is casually mentioned in the education part of the platform, as if he’s only talking about religious schools here, and you would be silly to presume otherwise. I feel like I could give Ookawa a few “evil mastermind” tips on concealing his master plan until he gets a solid majority.

5. The Defense/War Plan

Ookawa wants to eliminate the beloved Article 9 of the Japanese Constitution, which prevents the country from operating an army and navy. Article 9 has been a security godsend to Japan for the past 50 years– it defuses tense situations with China and the Koreas– and implementation of this item could lead to military responses from Japan’s neighbors quite quickly. This is the most dangerous part of the document, but it is also the least likely to see any results if a coalition government is formed. The Japan Times Herald interviewed a political analyst who pointed out that Article 9 is quite popular among the Japanese people, and a recent LDP government failed for suggesting the possibility of exactly what the HRP demands.

The language of this section strongly suggests not only a “strong defense” but an aggressive military which will infiltrate the North Korean government (with ninjas?) and kidnap Kim Jong Il if the long-missing Japanese citizens captured in North Korea are not returned to their home country. Yes, they are openly announcing that they will plan espionage in an unstable nuclear state. North Koreans could be reading this document at this very minute.

The “defense” plan for China is to tell them to dismantle all their nuclear weapons as a prerequisite for peace talks.

HRP will “consider renting nuclear weapons from the United States and Russia”. In a country that is home to the only two cities bombed in nuclear attacks, where over 200,000 were killed, no other party is this openly hawkish regarding the nuclear option. Oh, but in case you’re wondering, the final bullet point affirms that Ookawa is committed to realizing world peace.

6. Building an enormous maglev railroad from Japan to China, India, Europe, Great Britain, and Africa

Yeah, you know what? I’m not even going to bother detailing this. Oh, he wants to build a base on Mars as well.

Conclusion

The economic aspects of Ookawa’s plan, which pop up throughout the document, are beyond the wildest dreams of America’s Libertarian Party. They are based in the grand fantasies of the economic bubble that are quickly fading and would be disastrous in implementation. The defense aspect, a staple of the HRP’s fearmongering advertising campaign, resembles the worst of American offensive realism, and the mere posting of these suggestions on a party website is somewhat disturbing. Also, the entire long-term development plan depends on the arrival of sentient robots. But besides these three fatal flaws, Ookawa’s plan is great! Open borders and free Japanese lessons for immigrants? A population of 300 million by 2030? The largest GDP in the world? A maglev that will take me to Great Britain and a base on Mars? Hell, count me in!

From a religious scholar’s perspective, it’s difficult to know what to make of this combination of New Age utopian fantasy with Machiavellian pursuit of raw economic and military power. The long-term plans remind me of nothing if not a sci-fi anime, or even the setting of the visual novel Ever17. The world of Ryuuhou Ookawa’s strong and independent Japan is one where the skies are a little bit bluer, there’s no trash in the streets, and everyone lives in a two story mansion. If you’re being cynical, I guess you could say this is a platform to support the weight of Ookawa’s megalomaniacal personality. On the other hand, though, this could just the ends supporting the means, a balance of his sci-fi utopian ideals with the most “realistic” tools to achieve them.

UPDATE

I just found an official party video which confirms the utopian image I outlined above. There are no subtitles but if you’ve read through this article you will be able to understand this video quite well. The title is “LDP or DPJ or Happiness Realization Party?”